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digimind
thwack
While home with my parents this evening, I went at a shelf in my bedroom closet to try and throw away any old junk I don't need anymore. I was going through a couple trees worth of tractor-feed computer paper with various things printed on it (a lot of code, user manuals, etc) when I came across a printout of this joke:

Three kingdoms were in dispute over claims to an island in the middle of a lake on which they all bordered. Finally, after exhausting all diplomatic options, the rulers of the three kingdoms decided to send their best knights to the island for a great battle, and the winning kingdom would have claim to the island forever.
On the night before the battle, the three knights rowed out to the island, each with a retinue of their best squires. Two of the groups of squires promptly got down to the business of polishing armor, sharpening weapons, and just generally making sure their respective knights were ready to face the others in the morning.
Meanwhile, the third squire tied a rope around the handle of a large kettle, hoisted it off the ground by a tree branch, and began cooking dinner, leaving his knight to tend to his own armor and weapons.
The battle, which began promptly at sunrise, was spectacular. Three knights in gleaming armor clashed with razor-sharp weapons. On and on it raged, until all three knights were dead.
Since the conflict had not been resolved, the squires then engaged in a battle of their own, until the only squire left standing was the one who had hoisted up the kettle to cook dinner the night before.

The moral: "The squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires on the other two sides!"

Even better was the tagline that showed up at the bottom of the message containing the joke: "A seamstress tucks up frills, while a trombone player..."

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Learned a different version of that one...

A similar joke got me through high school Geometry back in the day. :)

Deep in the heart of the jungle, there is a small tribe who decides the wealth of a man by the weight of his wives.

There came a day when Ogg wished to challenge Oogh for the title of Wealthiest Man. So, the village gathered to weigh their wives. Ogg had only one wife, but she was a rather large squaw. Oogh had two wives, both slender. So, Ogg's wife sat upon a hippopotamus hide, and Oogh's wives sat upon antelope hides, and the scales were rigged. And the villagers found that the squaw on the hippopatamus was equal to the sum of the squaws of the other two hides.

:)

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